More unhinged narrative design: What if RPG stats measured weaknesses instead of strengths? Part Two – Turn those boring old stats into snazzy new anti-stats!
Time to break some more table tops! (and also my face...)
Note: If the following diatribe here is a little confusing, it’s probably because of the probable microconcussion that I probably gave myself this morning when I walked straight into the corner of the bathroom wall as I tried to grope my way blindly to the toilet at 4:23 a.m. (I still haven't cleaned up all of the blood.)
Side note: if my most noticeable facial scar comes from trying to pee, I'm going to be very put out.
Anyways, on to being terrible and cursed and wretched!
Last time I talked about this super janky little “Dark Souls style cursed kingdoms of the wretched and undead” minimalist RPG system that I threw together for Garbage Fountain, and I promised the 1.25* of you who actually read the post that I was going to upload rules next time, and behold, next time is here.
*We lost .25 due to tariffs.
So, without further ado (or cranial trauma) here’s how you take a normal RPG character and ruin them for This Phantasmal Kingdom, a partially finished RPG system that no one asked for! I might even come back and pretend to finish it at some point before I die*!
*Presumably, by accidentally decapitating myself whilst attempting to butter toast.
If you'd like to take a mighty hero from D&D, Dungeon Crawl Classics, Old-School Essentials, or another retro clone of your choice and turn them into your own wretched, hungry shade, it works like so:
Your 6 mighty stats shrivel down into 3 anti-stats:
Trembling
Which governs all acts of speed, coordination, and dexterity. (Climb a wall, leap across a chasm, pick a lock.) It's derived from the highest of your dexterity, agility, or other physical nimbleness statistics.
Weakness
Which governs all acts of physical strength and resilience. (Swing a sword, push a boulder, kick down a door.) It's derived from the highest of your strength, constitution, might, or other physical resilience statistics.
Insanity
Which governs all acts of communication, observation, and investigation. (Decipher tracks, listen at a door, parlay with a creature.) It's derived from the highest of your intelligence, wisdom, personality, spirit, or other psychological statistics.
Just take the appropriate stat from your living self, chop it in half (rounded down), and subtract the resulting number from 14. The shriveled, mutilated final result is your anti-stat. That's the number that you have to roll over in order to do stuff!
Stuff like this!
• Listen at doors to see if you can hear what's on the other side (overcome Insanity to hear anything over the constant screaming of your own mind).
• Parlay with those outside of your own party (overcome Insanity to say anything coherent).
• Kick down doors (overcome Weakness).
• Leap, scramble, climb, etc. (overcome Trembling).
• Etc.
- An example transformation -
In life, Kragnor Thunderthigh had a Strength* of 15. Now that he's accidentally brained himself on a Dragon's jangly bits while attempting to guitar-solo-power-slide between its legs to freedom and awoken in This Phantasmal Kingdom, he would calculate his Weakness like so:
Half of 15 is 7.5, which rounds down to 7.
14 - 7 = 7.
The once mighty warrior with a Strength of 15 becomes a pale and hungry ghost with a Weakness of 7. When attempting acts of physical strength and resilience, he would need to roll a 7 or higher to succeed.
*He also has a Testicular Fortitude rating of 14, but since Strength is higher, we go with Strength.
And there you have it!
I was going to write a bunch more about some of the other rules, but I really need track down whatever it is in my house that smells so much like brain damage.
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